Feb 16, 2009

Trader Joes

We needed to swing by Trader Joe's in Shrewsbury this afternoon to buy a gift card for one of Spencer's co-workers.  As I was turning into the parking lot, I had an old geezer in a pick-up truck behind me honking his horn because apparently I wasn't moving fast enough in the parking lot for him.  (Little did he realize that honking his horn only increased the number of people I was letting out before I continued on into the parking lot.  Ha Ha!)

Aside from his rudeness, I was telling Spencer that I would never honk my horn in a parking lot because you never know if the person is going to follow you into the same store or do something crazy.  We agreed it's always easier to lay on the horn when you're in traffic and can make a speedy getaway. Sure enough, the old curmudegeon went into Trader Joes and we followed quietly behind.

But what if,  instead,  I decided to stalk the old bastard in the store? I wonder if he would appreciate me following closely behind him going up and down the aisles shouting, "Beep! Beep! Beep! Move your slow ass!" Now that I would have found satisfying.

But I digress...

I simply do not like Trader Joe's.  The aisles are way too small and there are far too many people who shop there that are oblivious to supermarket etiquette. I find the people who frequent Trader Joe's to be of a hippy-like nature and/or earthy-crunchy.  (Why is it that Whole Foods or places like Trader Joe's always have men of all ages walking around in tube socks and leather sandals?) I'm more of a Stop & Shop gal myself.

The only thing I ever buy at Trader Joe's is their branded balsamic vinegar and because I go there so infrequently, I usually will buy like five bottles of the stuff so I don't have to go back to the store more than like a few times a year.

As we were checking out, the cashier asked me if I would like some free roses?  His question sort of startled me.  "Sure, " I replied and he went over to a little basket and handed me a dozen red long-stemmed roses.  I thanked him and said this was the best part of my day.  And as we were walking out, another Trader Joe's lady tried to give me more roses.  But I held up my bouquet and told her I was all set.

Spencer and I commented that giving out free roses to their customers was a nice touch considering they had a ton of them and would probably have to throw them out anyway.  I know it certainly made my trip all the more pleasant despite the old guy beeping at me in the parking lot.

I just hope she didn't give him a bunch of flowers as he was leaving the store.  If he did get some free roses, then I secretly wish he pricked his dried up old fingers on the thorns. That will teach him to honk is horn at me!

Feb 14, 2009

Aren't you a little cute for a Stormtrooper

Happy Valentine's Day!

She's Not Surprised At All

My co-worker Michelle sent me an email a while back depicting a toilet all decked out to look like a scarecrow.  She said she saw it and immediately thought of me.  Her exact words were:  I saw this and thought of you...this is "too much time on your hands" in my book.... Her email sparked a quick response from another co-worker Jillian: 
I think they took this picture at Kim's house!

I quickly responded as follows: C’Mon!  That is way too creepy.  Do you think I’d want a creepy scarecrow smiling at me while I went Potty?  I don’t think so.  But I do appreciate the use of the tissue dispenser in the top of the hat.  Her reply came just as quickly back: You’re right!  What was I thinking?? – its not like it was something cool like a demon coming out of your wall or anything.  To which I replied,  Ahem, it was a grey ALIEN.  Completely different.

Here's the photo of the grey Alien that Spencer bought me as a gift from Design Toscano 

I had posted a link on my Facebook wall saying how much I loved this Alien and how I wanted to own it for our house.  He surprised me later with this little guy and suggested that we repaint our bedroom so that we could put the alien over our bed.  I immediately thought this was a fabulous idea!  Right now our bedroom is painted bright Big Bird yellow because that's my favorite color, but what I didn't realize when I painted the room was pretty much nothing goes well with bright yellow. So now you know about one of my upcoming house projects.  

The next step is trying to convince Jillian to sew me some nice bedroom curtains with spaceships on them.

And You Wonder Why I Don't Cook?

My best buddy Marty sent me a picture a few weeks back of what looked like a grilled Guinea Pig with potatoes on a dinner plate.   I can only guess that she sent this to me because we've got this little private joke that dates back to our preteens when I had Guinea Pigs as pets because my grandmother wouldn't allow dogs in the house.  (This was before the arrival of the blue-eyed puppy I named Syd Vicious).

The following is lifted directly from our mutual emails back and forth:

Marty: I don't think you'd like Peru. This is one of their dishes there. Guinea Pig!

Me: HOLY SHIT!  Did you take this picture which means if you did I might have to seriously reconsider you as my best friend in the universe.  If you were just surfing the 'net and came across this, well then, I'm OK with that.
Which is it?  (Please be surfing the 'net)

Marty: LOL! You are a RIOT! I was looking for a photo of a Mexican dish I've had before, Chicharron, (fried pork fat and meat--yummy, but an artery clogger) and then I saw this and thought, "SHIT! Kim would shit a brick if she saw this!" So, that's what happened. I have eaten rabbit, frog, alligator, snails, and loots of other stuff, but NEVER guinea pig! What kind of person do you think I am?!?!?! HA HA HA HA!

So I can't help myself whenever I see something relating to Guinea Pigs, Rick Springfield or The Smurfs because that was our weird little language of best friendship back in the early 80's.  Marty wrote dirty lyrics involving Smurfette to the tune of "Don't Talk to Strangers" and she teased me because I had little piggies for pets.

It's a good feeling to have a friend in your life that knew you way back when you lusted after Simon LeBon, could expel Cream of Mushroom soup through the nostrils at the slightest joke by her in sixth grade and felt bad about poor Johnny Green.

Jason Mraz sings The Rainbow Connection

Feb 10, 2009

Benson: Super Cool MacDaddy

One of the interesting things about my Netflix queue is I’ve loaded it up with a little bit of everything. I’m not a viewer who really favors one genre over another although lately one could argue that I’ve got this obsessive streak going for that strikingly handsome new 007 Bond guy and I’m basically watching anything that he’s ever acted in regardless of content.

But aside from the movies, I love Netflix because I can watch television shows as they come out on DVD. At home, I have Season One (disc 1) of The Gilmore Girls (in homage to a recommendation from a former co-worker Scott who couldn’t stop praising the writing ) and Season One (disc 1) of Benson. Yes folks, Benson.

I was thinking this morning about which show to start watching tonight. I thought it would be historically appropriate for me to watch Benson since we have such a high-ranking African American in government office right now. (Although Benson was the Head of Household Affairs for Governor Eugene Gatling, he was the most intelligent and quick-witted smart-ass I ever recall seeing on TV back in the late 70’s other than Archie Bunker.) And then I sealed the deal by remembering the German cook Gretchen Kraus.

Back in 1979 when the show first aired, I was a mere nine years old and I’m pretty sure I didn’t understand the delicate balance of sexual tension amongst TV characters. But somehow I recall Benson and Kraus going at it all the time…just without the sexual overtones. As the show progressed into the early eighties, the Governor’s daughter Katie and the scatter-brained Secretary Marcy Hill came to be beloved characters of mine.

As with most newly rediscovered things from my childhood, I did a little information gathering on Wikipedia and discovered a little known fact the episode titled ‘Scenario’ airing back on 2/2/85:

Benson was the first to reference the Internet on American Network television by having one of the characters make reference to accessing the ARPANET, the progenitor of the Internet.

Pretty cool, huh?

I’m looking forward tonight to watching Benson – the original super cool macdaddy.

Feb 4, 2009

Just Call Me Angel...

My corporate parking sticker is black which means that 3 months out of the year I'm required to use the shuttle service up The Mountain to get to work.  My month's are February, June and October. 

Since I'm unwilling to get up earlier so I can get into work and nab a 'free space' parking spot up there on The Mountain, I find myself riding the shuttle up and down every day for my month.  

February 2009 so far has been really weird.  I've managed to ride the shuttle bus in the morning three-count them-three straight days in a row all by myself.  Each morning there hasn't been any fellow co-workers on the bus except me and the shuttle driver George.  It's weird because this never happens.

I mentioned to George this morning that I couldn't believe yet again that I had him and his shuttle all to myself.  He told me it's because I get to work too early, but I tend to doubt it.  I fear the recent corporate layoffs of 1000 employees has a little something to do with it, but that's strictly speculation on my part.

So tonight when I jumped on the shuttle a little after 5pm, it was just me and the shuttle driver.  Since I had the shuttle all to myself, I couldn't contain my excitement over such a strange anonomly. I chatted the driver up as we worked our way down The Mountain.  My small talk today was witty and inspired, but I know that's only because I had the shuttle driver all to myself and didn't have an audience to overhear our conversation.

After bidding her a  goodnight, I hopped into my car and turned up the defroster.  I pulled out my little tub of grapes and strawberries to snack on for the ride home and was just about to back out of my parking space when a woman approached the driver's side of my car. I rolled down the window and she asked me for help.  Could I tell her how to get to North Attleboro?

Lucky for her, I knew exactly how to get her back home.  (Can I just state for the record that this NEVER happens to me?  I'm always the one lying to the person begging off, saying, "Oh, I'm not from around here."  It's true that for the most part, I'm hopeless when it comes to giving directions because I can't visualize left and right in my head when trying to map out a route to get from Point A to Point B. It's simply a mental deficiency.)  

I came to find out that Rosette was from North Attleboro and had driven all the way to Wal-Mart in Natick to pick up curtains being held for her by a store associate.  (Poor Rosette thought she was picking up the curtains in Bellingham, but instead found out the curtains were really in Natick.  Given that she was half way there already, she pressed on from Bellingham to Natick and that's when she got lost and ended up in my parking lot in Framingham.)

Rosette thanked me profusely and I offered to swap cell phone numbers with her just in case she got lost again. I told her to follow closely behind me as we exited the parking lot and I would get her to the exit for 495 South.  "Oh, you're such an angel.  Thank you! Thank you!" she kept saying to me.  

She did a great job following me down Route 9 and I checked in with her one last time via cell to make sure she was going the right way.  Once again she thanked me for being an angel...

I had a rotten day at work and being able to help out this nice lady was pretty much the highlight of my day. If it wasn't for the corporate shuttle, I would have never been placed in her path tonight to offer my help.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow's adventure.

Feb 2, 2009

My Favorite Super Bowl Commercial

I didn't actually watch the Super Bowl last night other than turning it on for background noise while I settled into my pillows and took a much needed nap from a busy day. 

Little did I know that my lazy snooze cost me the pleasure of seeing the Bridgestone Tire commercial featuring Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head!  What a cute commercial.  I love that her mouth flies off while he's taking that hairpin turn so the only way she can communicate her displeasure is by putting on her 'angry' eyes.
Very, very clever.